You might be grossed out, but don't poop in a bag after eating this stuff, run to the toilet. Don't be lazy, and lets eat.
Last night I did some adventure cooking. Free-form recipe less, hungry after work blender raging. I tried to hit up the Lucky's by the lake, but I was discouraged by no baskets, high prices, and long lines. Fuck that, bike on brothers and sisters! After getting home, I walked to Supermercado Los Pericoso a nice market and Mexican restaurant just past the International Aquarium.
This place is surprisingly big, especially if you include the restaurant connected to it. It has a deli, produce, essentials, a huge array of canned Mexican goods and spices, and giant jarritos to water-board yourself with on guacamole night.
INGREDIENTS:
For my dinner tonight I picked up a white onion, a bag of chopped nopales, can of pinto beans, a carrot, and one ripe avocado. I think my total was around five dollars. As I put my groceries on the counter, I take check of what I have in my food cabinet. I have a redbull from Thailand, 2 pita pockets, pasta, a bag of white rice, a half empty can of Italian bread crumbs, and a pristine jar of crunchy peanut butter. Whats going to mold, has got to go! I take the pita pockets and plump it on the counter. Taking a fridge check I notice a container of taco tuck salsa from almost a week ago, and also put that on the counter.
COOKIN':
First I blend the onion and the nopales together in a blender. Smells a little interesting, but I'm going to wait till I get some beans in there before I sweat it. I put the rinsed pinto beans in and blend, going from a mean green to a mild green brown medley. Hm. Interesting. I take a cheese grader and shred the carrot into the mixture, adding just enough to add some orange highlights to the musky goop.
Well, we got something. I take about a quarter cup of flour and mix it in, attempting to make a kind of dough. Frankly, its not really coming together man. I question weather to switch over to bean dip and scoop out a chip full. Nope! I toss in some garlic powder and steak seasoning, you know, its a burger. Sweat starts to form on my brow, as I think of the only saving throw I got here, I got to fry the shit out of it. I pour it onto a heated skillet with olive oil, and form it into a patty shape with a spatula.
While that's sizzlin', I cut up an avocado into pieces, and stuff a little bit of it into the pita bread. I check the bottom of the bean patty and see that its still pretty soft, and not too cooked. My roommate asks me how its going.
I entered my cooking adventure with a clean kitchen. I looked at my blender, carrot shreds on the counter, bowl of bean mixture, garlic powder and salt containers open, and I remain optimistic. "I think it will be edible."
I flip, cook and stuff the patty into the first pita pocket, in pieces.I topped it off with some avocado, and take a look at what I've created. Partly curious, skeptical, I take a first bite, making sure its loaded with extra avocado. I am not outright disgusted, or really in love with what I made.
I am starting to think that the bland, highly questionable, Pinto Bean Nopales Pita Burger I have made is a representation of the bland, highly questionable routine that my life has become. Sleep, Eat, Work, Groceries, Taco Truck. God dammit, we were supposed to stay young, right? That's when I remember the taco truck salsa.
I pop open the little Styrofoam container and give a generous pour onto my now Pinto Bean Nopales Pita Burger. I start to have a sensation that I am eating some profane version of re-fried beans, scraped off the bottom of a Rosarita factory from 1970. The ingredients were mostly Mexican, but I felt like this didn't really belong to any culture. And whats up with that pita bread? I could have at least used a tortilla. I was left with even more questions then when I started. Stay tuned to the next episode.
